


a litany of dreams

by light_loves_the_dark



Category: The Librarians (TV 2014)
Genre: 1x01, 3x06, Canon Compliant, Ezekiel Loves Pranks, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Flynn is Definitely Possessive Over Eve's Time and Energy, Gen, Getting Together, I love this show but they definitely skipped some of the scenes that definitely happened, Important Conversations, Jake is Definitely Gonna Threaten Flynn at Some Point, Missing Scene, More Cal Because Why Not, Okay I'm Done Tagging I Promise, One Shot Collection, Parents Eve Baird/Flynn Carsen, Post 3x06, Post 3x09, Romance, SO, So Married, So much flirting, Team Bonding, so that is what this is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:07:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23120722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/light_loves_the_dark/pseuds/light_loves_the_dark
Summary: Eve knows that Flynn and she have the makings of truly great partners - she’s never worked as well with someone as she did when she met him in Berlin. If that’s them with no preparation, she’s pretty confident they’ll be fine.After all, she’s a Guardian. She’s Flynn’s Guardian. Just the thought of it shifts something into place.-aka the one where i just write all the scenes that clearly happened offscreen. will probably be updated sporadically. now includes scenes from 1x01, 3x06, and 3x09
Relationships: Eve Baird/Flynn Carsen
Comments: 21
Kudos: 37





	1. post 1x01 - when did flynn ask eve to stay on as guardian?

**Author's Note:**

> each chapter will be titled with its episode and a question i'm answering in the scene. hope you guys enjoy!
> 
> title from snow and dirty rain by richard siken.

“You okay?”

Flynn starts from his position leaning up against the shelves, several ancient-looking books spread out on the floor in between his legs. He looks up to see Eve, who gives him honestly too fond a look for how little time they’ve known each other - of course, he’s no better; he knows that same affection is returned in his own. She slides down the shelf until she is sitting next to him. “We’ve got to stop meeting like this,” she adds, teasing, and just wow, in the brightness of her smile everything seems to slow around him and -

Okay, he’s getting ahead of himself. 

“I don’t know if I want to,” he blurts out, willing himself not to blush. It doesn’t work, if the glint in her eye is any indication. “Stop, that is. Meeting you.” He drops his gaze from hers, closing his eyes for a moment to focus on the slight heat emanating from her body, only inches away from his. 

“Sure, Librarian,” she replies, nudging his shoulder. “So, I was thinking-”

Several lightbulbs go off in his brain. “Thinking!” He announces, scrambling to his feet. Once he is steady, he automatically reaches a hand down to help her to her feet. Which is funny, because her hand had been reaching for his before he even offered it. He’s known her for hours, but a part of him he’s not going to acknowledge already feels like it’s been years. 

He pulls her up next to him, chastising his heart because it jumps when her hip brushes his. “Yes, there’s lots of thoughts to work through - lots of information that needs going over,” he rambles, covering up the way he’s not planning on letting go of her hand. “Jenkins has sorted transportation for the kids. We’ll need to keep an eye on them,” he adds, leading her down the stairs and into the main Annex. “They should be able to go back to their normal lives, but the Serpent Brotherhood could try to finish the job. They should have a way to contact us.”

To her credit, though he’s speaking very quickly, Eve is following everything. She is stepping off the bottom stair when she finally gets a word in edgewise. “Is there a way-”

“Portland!” Flynn interrupts, mind still flying. He pulls her hand through the crook in his arm so she can walk beside him. She comes closer willingly, her hip bumping against his. Flynn gives up on trying to stop his heart from pounding at her slightest touch. “Portland, Portland. Did you know Portland got its name from a coin flip between the settlers who founded it? One was from Massachusetts and he wanted to name it Boston. The other was from Portland, Maine, and the rest is history! Now, we’ll need to restock before we go back out. Get groceries. Is there a store nearby? I mean, we’ll be out there more than back here, but what if we come back and there’s no Fanta? Can you imagine, Eve,  _ no Fanta _ -” 

“Flynn-” Eve tries again as they reach the doors leading outside. 

“We’ll need to move here too - closer to the Annex. Maybe that can wait. When’s your lease up? Wait, where do you live-?”

“ _ Flynn. _ ”

Finally catching onto the clear irritation in her voice, he brings them to a stop right before they exit the Annex. “ _ What? _ ” He complains. 

“You’re acting like I’m your Guardian,” she says hesitantly, slipping her arm from his. He feels the loss acutely, but he shakes it off. They’ll have plenty of time for arm-clasping and hand-holding in their future. Their very near future, if he has any say in it.

He gives her a funny look. “Eve, of course you’re my Guardian. Haven’t we been through this? Chance meeting, magical summons, saving the world - ooh transitive alliteration-” 

Eve reaches forward, clapping a hand over his mouth. He just stares at her, eyes wide. “Does  _ ‘I don’t need her _ ’ ring a bell, Librarian?” After a second of thinking, he begins attempting unsuccessfully to speak through her hand. “Thought so,” she replies to his sudden comprehension. “What changed?”

Giving up on talking into her hand, he reaches up and takes it from his mouth, patting it absently with his other hand before releasing it. “I… I may have… miscalculated.” Eve hums, raising an eyebrow. “You, Eve Baird, are perfect Guardian material,” he adds, flashing her what he hopes is an adorable smile. She just stares at him expectantly.  _ Right _ , Flynn thinks. “I’m… sorry?” He tries. 

Eve sighs, rolling her eyes. “That’ll have to do,” she replies, before giving him a smile that warms him from the inside out. “Now, Librarian, what’s the plan?”   
  
The warmth doesn’t fade, but he can’t help but groan. “Oh, you’re one of  _ those _ .” Then he takes her hand again, pulling her into the sunlight. “We’ll work on it,” he promises. “For now, step one, send the kids on their respective ways.”

“Flynn, maybe -” 

“Step two,” he announces, cutting her off, “save the Library.”

Eve shrugs, letting herself be pulled along. She doesn’t like being interrupted, but she’s aware that partnerships take time. Luckily, Flynn and she have the makings of great partners - she’s never worked as well with someone as she did when she met him in Berlin. If that’s them with no preparation, she’s pretty confident they’ll be fine.

After all, she’s a Guardian. She’s Flynn’s Guardian. Just the thought of it shifts something into place. 

Then she meets the sad eyes of the three potential Librarians. A few minutes later, Flynn and she decide to take a raincheck on their shared adventures. 

_ It’s okay _ , she thinks as she watches him bumble down the hallways after she kisses him. They’ll just have to take the long way around.


	2. post 3x09 - how did eve tell flynn about rockwell?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one makes me happy - i understand why it couldn't be in the show, but i was so excited to write it. side note: it's amazing how many times i used the word 'sarcophagus' in this ch and i STILL can't spell it. 
> 
> s/o to asia for her flynn swearing headcanon! it was v helpful. 
> 
> let me know what you think!! <3

In the darkness of late evening, in the silence of the Library, Eve Baird stares with unseeing eyes at her Librarian’s candle. On any normal day, the haphazard nature of the struggling flame would cause her severe anxiety, but her mind is too far away at the moment.

Rockwell wants her to betray the Library. The Library is the only place where Apep can be destroyed. Apep’s sarcophagus is in Rockwell’s possession.

To many people, these would be merely a series of facts. To Eve, they are thick reels of thread that have the ability to be woven into a plan.

Side note: she’s been around the Library and its Librarians far too long if she’s making bad tapestry metaphors.

The conclusion that she comes to is actually relatively simple. Pretend to betray the Library and work for DOSA. Gain access to Apep and destroy him. But she’s stuck on the “betray” part, and she knows that if she tells her team the truth, Rockwell will catch on and ruin everything. 

She can do it, she knows. She can fool them all, even Flynn, to save them. And if she loses their trust, it doesn’t matter. As long as she saves them.

At least that’s what she tells herself.

“Eve?”

She starts, eyes snapping away from Flynn’s candle to meet the eyes of the man himself. His voice is low and raspy, his eyes rimmed with red, and the way he’s holding himself makes her believe he’s only seconds from a total breakdown.

“Oh Flynn,” she murmurs in response, pressing her lips together so she can’t give him the pitying look she knows he hates. When she says his name, his shoulders begin to shake. “Come here.” As if he had been waiting for any sort of invitation, he stumbles toward her, pulling her into him with trembling arms and wrapping himself around her like a vise. She barely has room to return the embrace, but she manages, shifting so that she can support his weight if he becomes unsteady. She holds him like that for a long time as he sniffles in her arms, mere hours after they lost Charlene, before pulling back slightly. Thoughts of plans and tapestries fade as she focuses on the here and now: taking care of her Librarian, who has just lost the equivalent of a mother. “Let’s go home, hm?”

Flynn nods, and the Door to the candle room leads them into their bedroom. They toe off their shoes and Eve helps Flynn undress, her movements efficient and gentle, pushing him onto the bed before undressing herself. She grabs a t-shirt from his side of the closet and climbs in next to him. Unexpectedly, Flynn rolls her over so that he can be the big spoon. After a moment of him practically molding his body to hers, tucking her head under his chin and pressing his index and middle finger against the pulse of her wrist, she understands. She falls asleep almost instantly.

Flynn wakes her in the middle of the night when he squeezes her so tightly that her breathing is slightly impaired. Sometimes she forgets how strong he is; his loose suits hide the powerful body of a trained swordsman. “Honey?” she murmurs, questioning, voice raspy from sleep.

Flynn exhales harshly, pressing his lips to her temple. She wonders if he’s slept at all. “Go back to sleep,” he says in return, but his voice is ragged with grief and terror, and concern makes her more alert.

“Flynn…” She tries to turn, but he doesn’t let her. If it were anyone else trying to control her range of movement, she would’ve thrown them off her. But this is Flynn. He needs her right now, and besides, she feels safe despite the unyielding grip he has on her. 

There is silence for a long moment, and then: “you’re all I have left,” he whispers, broken and raw. “You’re all I have left and I know you’re the Guardian -  _ my _ Guardian - but I just couldn’t bear it if you-”

“I’m not going anywhere,” she swears. It’s an easy promise to make, but when thoughts of Rockwell and Apep swarm her mind, she swallows hard.

“Don’t lie to me, Eve,” he snaps back. “Everybody leaves.” The absolute certainty in his voice is heartbreaking.

And just like that, she knows that she has to tell him.

But not tonight, she thinks, as she whispers sweet nothings and empty promises until he relaxes against her back, nuzzling into her neck. Tonight, she’ll let him hold her and give him promises she’s terrified that she won’t be able to keep.

-

She puts it off for a couple days, avoiding the team as she makes her Plan A and countless contingency plans, taking Cal deep into the Library to spar. After all, Cal can’t ask probing questions; he only hovers nervously when she pauses their bouts to make a note or two. Plus, he’s been teaching her how to use a staff - a weapon she’s quite enjoying. That afternoon, however, they’re working with swords in one of her favorite training rooms when Flynn finds her three days after Charlene’s passing. She doesn’t see him at first, focused on not losing her sword, but eventually Cal pulls back and gestures behind her. She spins, seeing her boyfriend leaning against the door with his arms casually crossed over his chest.

“You with a sword,” he says by way of greeting, “will never not be  _ incredibly _ hot.” 

“Double negative, Librarian,” she points out. She tries to smile, but she thinks it comes out more like a grimace. And Flynn is far too smart not to notice.

“Can be used for emphasis,” he finishes, winking at her. “Masters in English Literature, my dear Guardian.” He pushes off the wall, taking a step toward her. “Now, you’ve been avoiding me, and that’s not like you at all.” His gaze turns concerned. “Is it Charlene? I know you didn’t know her well, but seeing another Guardian…”

“No, it’s not Charlene,” she sighs. “I just wanted to give you some time to grieve before telling you.”

Concern deepens into worry. “Telling me what?”

She takes a deep breath. Here goes nothing. “I wasn’t… kidnapped. In Shangri-La.”

Flynn looks confused. She would enjoy the novelty of it if it weren’t this exact situation. “They were going to sell you to the highest bidder,” he states, but it comes out more like a question.

Eve nods. “They did. The highest bidder… It was DOSA.”

“Those idiots?” Flynn scoffs. “You’re right; you weren’t kidnapped. I’m shocked Jones had to break you out at all.”

Eve exhales. “He didn’t, actually. They let me go.”

Flynn’s gaze hardens, and she flinches. “Eve, what’s going on?” His voice is deeper, and the worry hovers on the verge of panic.

She takes a couple steps away from him to distance herself, heart sinking when Cal moves from behind her to float in between them, turning back and forth like he’s unsure what’s happening. She knows Flynn is Cal’s best friend, but he enjoys her company too, and he’s never seen them fight. “I’ve told you about my mentor from NATO,” she begins. “How I took a bullet for her?” Flynn nods, a flicker of something passing over his expression. “Well, her name is Cynthia Rockwell. And apparently, she’s the head of DOSA.”

“ _ What _ ?”

Eve nods, blinking rapidly when she feels a familiar pressure behind her eyes. Oh god, this would be the worst time to cry. “I swear to you I didn’t know until now. She… she told me that I was a sleeper agent - that she gave me the mission to Berlin knowing that I’d meet you, hoping that I might be recruited by the Library. This whole time…” 

Flynn takes several steps towards her, expression unreadable as his quick mind processes everything she’s saying, and she instinctively backs away. “I swear, Flynn, I would never betray you like that,” she begs. 

Flynn stares at her for several beats, Cal hanging indecisively between them. 

Then he bursts into laughter. “I - I’m sorry,” he gasps. “Eve, that’s - that’s a load of toffee! I - I -  _ hogwash _ !” She just stares at him, tears dotting her cheeks, and he waves a careless hand in the air as he clarifies. “I mean, it’s complete and utter nonsense!”

It’s almost like her brain has slowed to a stop, unable to comprehend his reaction. She can’t make her tongue work as she opens her mouth and expects more words to tumble out. Flynn has always been extremely wary of betrayal; from what she knows about his past, he has a right to be. She had expected to be kicked out of the Library, at least while he thought everything out. Instead, he’s laughing at her.

Finally, she manages something. “You… you’re not…”

Flynn takes another step forward, and she mirrors him with one back. At her caution, he holds out his hands like he’s calming a feral animal. Honestly, she kind of feels like one. 

“Eve,” he says, laughter fading as his voice becomes low and soothing. “The Library has been around for millenia. It’s chosen hundreds of Librarians and Guardians, and I’ve studied nearly all of them. Never once has the Library been tricked or fooled into making a decision. Made some bad ones? Sure. But if the Library chose you, it’s because it knew you’d be a great Guardian. For the kids. For  _ me _ . And you’ve proved it right every time.”

Eve’s breath hitches; she wants nothing more to cross the room and fall into his arms, but she needs to be sure. “I’ve worked for the US government my whole life, Flynn. I gave them my loyalty.”

He gives her a curious look. “Are you trying to convince me not to trust you?” He shakes his head, a disbelieving smile on his face. “Eve, I trust you with my life. I trust you with the Library. Nothing anyone says, you included, will ever change my mind.”

She shakes her head. “Even I doubted myself for a moment,” she whispers, more to herself than to him.

His gaze softens. “It’s okay if you had doubts, if you still have doubts. You’ve told me about Rockwell before, how important she is to you - I understand if this is difficult-”

“No, you don’t get it,” she argues, and finally something clicks in her brain. “The reason I’m conflicted is because I was never conflicted at all,” she reveals, both to him and to herself. He gives her an adorably confused look, tilting his head. “It’s always going to be you,” she admits, sounding altogether torn and angry and certain. “The Library - the others - and you. There’s no other side I’ll ever be on, because I love you, Flynn.”

The words are barely out of her mouth when he strides forward, slipping a hand around her neck and pulling her into a kiss. She hears a faint squeak from Cal as he speeds out the door, not unlike any of the others when they display any sort of affection for each other in the Library. 

The kiss itself is heavy with intent; after only several seconds, he licks into her mouth and sighs when her arms come around him like steel bands. “You,” he murmurs against her lips, “are a miracle.” He maneuvers them over to the couch, lips still locked with hers, sitting back and pulling her on top of him. When they break apart at the momentum, he gazes up at her as if she is a river he wants to drown himself in. “I do love nothing in the world so well as you,” he quotes helplessly, like he doesn’t know a better way to express himself other than to use words that aren’t his. 

She doesn’t seem to mind, settling easily onto his lap, knees on either side of his hips as she runs her hands through his mussed hair, tipping his head back so she can return the kiss. Eagerly giving up control, he eases both hands to her waist. They stay still for a long moment, but when she shifts meaningfully against him, they tighten almost reflexively, helping her hips rock against his. It feels so good, too good - they break apart, moaning at the feeling, before flashing each other rueful smiles.

“Not the best place, huh?” He ventures hoarsely, grinning dopily up at her. 

“No,” she murmurs, sliding off his lap and swinging her left leg to join the right, leaving both her legs resting over his thighs as she snuggles into his neck. He adjusts his arms around her automatically, one pressing against the small of her back and the other rubbing circles on her knee. He presses absent kisses to the crown of her head as they hold each other for a long moment. “We need a plan,” she says finally.

It’s a testament to how serious everything is that he doesn’t tease her about her love of plans. “We need to lure Apep here,” he clarifies.

Eve nods. “That’s what I was thinking. Rockwell told me that DOSA has the sarcophagus.”

Flynn hums. “So that’s why we couldn’t find it,” he murmurs. His arms tighten around her at the mention of Rockwell, but Eve doesn’t bring his attention to it. If he wants to feel protective over her, let him. She’s still in awe that he’s not in the least bit angry with her.

“I can’t think of any good reason for DOSA to bring it here,” she continues, “but if Apep learns that DOSA will be in the Library-”

“- then he’ll possess one of them to gain access,” Flynn finishes.

“It’ll have to be Rockwell,” Eve says, certain, a tinge of regret in her tone. “She’s in charge - Apep will want that.”

“Could you get her to open the sarcophagus?” 

Eve sighs against him. “Yes,” she says, but stops there.

Flynn huffs, pulling back a little so he can look at her. When she doesn’t automatically meet his eyes, he releases her knee so he can tilt her head up. “Tell me,” he murmurs knowingly. “You’re the strategist, Eve. I trust you.”

Eve gives him the ghost of a smile, pulling herself up a little so she can press a grateful kiss to his cheek. As always, he breathes deeply at the sensation, trembling at her touch. “Rockwell will only listen to me if she knows I’m on her side,” she discloses, brushing her nose along his jaw as she drops her gaze.

_ Oh.  _ Flynn isn’t an idiot. Suddenly, everything falls into place. “You want to be a double - no -  _ triple _ agent,” he realizes. “Let DOSA into the Library - take Apep in Rockwell’s body down to the catacombs…”

“You said the Eye of Ra can stop him,” she reminds him. 

Flynn sighs, sinking back into the couch and moving her head back to rest on his shoulder. “It can,” he agrees, squeezing his eyes shut when he knows she can’t see him. He can’t tell her about the price. He can’t afford to distract her from her role. If he can’t find another option by the time they enact this plan… 

Well. He knows what needs to be done.

“- we can lure Apep in with minimal fighting if we send the kids on a mission,” Eve is saying, and he can’t help it, he has to press his lips to her hair as she goes on talking. She’s so precious; he can barely stand even the mere thought of leaving her. If she is with him when everything goes down, he’s not sure he can do it. He’ll have to move quickly.

“What about the artifacts?” She continues. “If the ultimate fight between good and evil breaks out…”

“You said DOSA’s facilities weren’t half bad?” He interrupts, mumbling against her hair. Somehow she still understands him, and he’s relieved he doesn’t have to move. He doesn’t want her to look up and see how wet his eyes are.

“Rockwell showed me,” she replies. “They’re… acceptable. We can at least make sure the most volatile artifacts won’t be accidentally knocked over if the worst case scenario happens. Store the universe-altering ones somewhere in the hallway of doors.”

“We can work out the kinks in the coming week,” he adds. “But with the kids on a mission - and Jenkins and me in the Library when it goes down… it should work.”

She pauses. “We can’t tell them, you know. Even Jenkins. It’s bad enough you know - but I couldn’t let you think someone else betrayed you.”

He chuckles. “It wouldn’t have even been a good tactical move,” he admits. “If I really thought you betrayed the Library, my priority would be finding out why, no matter what else was happening. I’d be a mess - I wouldn’t be able to think straight.”

“You underestimate how strong you are,” she tells him fondly, patting his chest absently.

He pulls her tighter against him. “ _ You _ underestimate how much I need you. The Library gave me a home, but Eve, you gave me a  _ home _ .” He pauses. “Wait, that didn’t make any sense…”

She smiles up at him, but it fades into a frown when she sees the wet tracks down his cheeks. “Oh, Flynn,” she murmurs, and it takes all his strength not to fall apart in her arms. “You’re my home too.” 

After a long moment in silence, he sighs. “I don’t like the idea of the others thinking badly of you.” 

She looks down, twining their hands together. “It’s only for a few hours,” she says, “and they’ll be mad at us both when it’s over.”

He hums. He doesn’t want to think about the end - mostly because the only image in his head post-Apep is Eve’s face when she realizes what he’s done. “There’s a lot to consider,” he begins, studying their joined hands, “but what I really need right now - what I want - is to go home, curl up with my gorgeous Guardian on the couch, and not think about deceiving my friends for at least the next twenty-four hours.” He smooths his thumb along the joints of her fingers, rubbing softly.

What he really needs is to stop talking about this with Eve before he blurts out the price of the Eye and everything falls apart.

Thankfully, Eve just smiles at him. “The couch, not the bed?” she ventures with forced levity in her voice, swinging her legs off him.

If she can compartmentalize, so can he. He pulls her up with him, pressing her hands against his chest as he backs through the doorway to the training room. He’s never been more thankful for his ability to create a Door anywhere. Wiggling his eyebrows until she giggles helplessly, he brings one hand up to kiss. “The bed, the couch - I’m very flexible,” he flirts, flipping her hand over and pressing an open-mouthed kiss to her palm. The giggles cut off as her breath hitches, and he smirks in response. 

“You’re very confident,” she murmurs breathily. 

“Can you blame me?” He teases. “I’m a fan of all kinds of swordplay.”

Eve laughs loudly at that. “If any other man said that to me…” she trails off, stopping them right before the Door as her eyes widen in realization. “You’re trying to get me to shut you up,” she accuses.

He beams at her. “Is it working?”

Seconds later, they tumble through the Door together.

_ Yep, _ Flynn thinks while his mouth is busy with other pursuits.  _ It’s working. _

-

Several weeks later, they hide in between the shelves, pressed together, breathing each other in. Eve is scheduled to meet with Rockwell in half an hour. She knows that this could be the last time she sees Flynn as herself until this is all over. Flynn knows that this could be the last time he sees Eve as herself. Ever. 

“No matter what I say…” Eve trails off, pulling back just enough to press her forehead to his. 

“Same here,” he agrees, letting his eyes flutter shut. “I love you.” 

She snakes a hand behind his neck and pulls his lips to hers. It’s not a particularly passionate kiss; nothing in him wants to push it any further. No, this kiss is deep and steady and eternal in its own way. 

Suddenly, their four hundred years pressed together is not enough. A part of him wants to call up all the magic he’s learned in the past ten years to slow time to a stop, just so he can have another half a millenia with her in his arms. But it’s going to have to be enough - no matter how much more he wants. Not if he wants to save his home, his family, and the woman he loves.  
  
Finally, she breaks the kiss to embrace him one last time. “Come back alive, Librarian,” she whispers into his jacket, and he hopes she mistakes the way he shudders helplessly in her arms as the usual pre-mission jitters. He promises nothing. He can’t do that to her - not after all the promises he’s already shattering. 

“Ready?” he murmurs, but he doesn’t let go.

She does instead, smoothing her hands over his shoulders and giving him a tight smile. “Sure,” she shrugs. “We’ve killed plenty of mummies, right?” she jokes half-heartedly. 

He hums, falling into their bantering easily. “Well, can you call it killing if they’re already dead?” He asks, voice pitched higher in a teasing tone he knows she secretly loves. 

“Dusted, then,” she retorts, moving for the entrance to the Library, leaving him in the stacks.

“Semantics are important!” He calls out to her. She’s opened the door, and he can hear Cassandra’s giggling as their argument becomes audible to the Annex.

“Can you call it winning the argument if I can’t hear you?” She shouts back, and for once, he lets it be as the echo of her voice fades. He realizes that he’s grinning, and once that thought pops into his head, the grin fades too.

He walks into the Annex a few minutes later, taking up residence at their desk. Pulling out his new text on pre-Babylonian pottery and opening it to a random page, he allows himself to review the lies he’s about to tell. He’s never been a great liar, but his family and their lives depend on it. It’s crucial that everything goes as planned. 

“Okay, man?” Stone says from the staircase. He’s just plopped down with his own book, and Flynn gives him a faint smile.

“I’m a little worried about Eve,” he admits, and it’s not a lie. “She’s been disappearing a lot lately - I’m worried she was rattled by Charlene.” Also not truly a lie. Maybe this will be easier than he thought.

Stone gives him a reassuring look because he trusts Flynn and Eve and the Library and  _ nope _ . Flynn swallows hard. This is going to be exactly as difficult as he suspected. “Look, I know we don’t talk about the mushy stuff, but Baird… I know her. She’ll come ‘round, you’ll see.” He pauses, the certainty in his expression pulling at Flynn’s heartstrings. “She loves you.”

Flynn looks down at his book, embarrassed and ashamed and warm. “I know,” he murmurs, and thankfully, Stone leaves him alone with his thoughts after that. 

Paradoxically, Eve’s love makes what he’s about to do the easiest thing in the world - and the hardest. He takes a deep breath.

_ Out of the frying pan, _ he thinks a few hours later, greeting Eve as she walks into the Annex. He clutches the place in his suit jacket where the Eye sits, waiting. 

_ And into the fire. _


	3. post 3x06 - what did flynn and eve talk about after wonderland?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “When I told you I love you,” Flynn says, enunciating each word, trying to put weight onto each syllable, “that should mean something. That means something.” He peers up at Eve, still bent over her hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay. if i could beg tnt for one (1) missing librarians scene, it would be this one. trial of the triangle is the best librarians ep imo, and great for evlynn shippers and flynn development, but it was missing this honest scene between them at the end. so i wrote it. 
> 
> written while listening to daylight by tswift, so it's threaded throughout. 
> 
> thanks to @diaryofageekgirl for letting me scream at her about this song and evlynn!

Flynn decides to stay. 

If the world was simple, that would be the end of it. He would stay, the kids would accept him into their fold, and Eve would smile that warm, bright-eyed smile at him and he would be home, and that would be the end of it. 

It feels that way a little, when he makes the announcement. When they lay their hands on top of his and seem happy to have him there, celebrating a successful mission. It’s hard to remember that, only hours ago, he had been tied up in the Library while they took turns telling him all the ways he had failed. When Eve had stood there, the only person in the world who knows him, knows him truly, and told him that he was letting her down. And the worst part: it was true.

The Eye of Ra burns in his vest pocket.

It’s still true. 

He can handle the LITs disappointment. He thinks they’re great, but how much one-on-one time has he really spent with them? They don’t know what he’s been through. They don’t know that he has a perfectly good reason to be this arrogant, this impulsive. 

But Eve does. Even back during that first mission, she could see right through him. She is his Guardian, after all. She was always meant to be his; it’s a blessing and a curse to share a destiny like theirs.

And so, in anger, he had lashed out at her in that airport, sealing an explosive fight with a toe-curling kiss and a dramatic confession. And then he had gone back on his word an hour later, pushing her away again. 

He had apologized. She had forgiven him. But now that they are down by the Fountain of Youth with the others, he notices the careful space she leaves between their bodies on the couch. It’s not noticeable by the others, who are sprawled out on pillows and comfy armchairs around them, drinking beer from Stone’s secret stash. This is clearly a space that the others have created for this very purpose, and though a small part of him is hurt that he’s been unaware of it all this time, a greater part of him is relieved to be invited when he has only given them his word that things will change. They have no reason to believe him, and yet they do. 

One by one, the LITs and Jenkins call it a night. Ezekiel is the last to leave, casting a meaningful look back at Eve as he goes. When she nods, he leaves them alone.

After a long moment, Eve hums. “Time for bed?” She asks, standing. “I think I’ll go back to my apartment for the night.”

“Wait,” Flynn says, hastily standing himself. 

Eve just looks at him. “Uh-uh, no more research tonight. One Lewis-Carroll inspired mission is enough excitement for twenty-four hours,” she teases, looking up at him like she expects him to banter back, leaving all the baggage between them without a care.

He thinks back to the Red Queen’s question:  _ are you a caring friend?  _ And he’s not, he’s never been, and he’s been a terrible boyfriend as well. Eve is hurt, and she’s avoiding it because she’s afraid of hurting him. 

Well. No more.

“Are we okay?” He asks directly, forcing himself to hold eye contact. 

She looks surprised for a moment; the arrogant part of him is a little bit proud at having caught her out at her game, even if it is supposed to be for his own benefit. After opening and closing her mouth once, she gives him a reassuring look. “We’re good,” she confirms, reaching to take his hand. She squeezes it once before dropping it.

“I… Eve, I don’t think we are.”

Eve’s brain grinds to a halt. “Hold up. You, Flynn Carsen, one man show, lonely hero, want to talk about your feelings?”

He winces. “I told you things were going to change,” he reminds her, retaking her hand. 

“You didn’t mention a personality transplant,” she mutters, and he can’t help the chuckle that builds in his throat. After a long moment, she pins him with an intense stare. “And if  _ I _ don’t want to talk?”

His smile falters, but he nods, short and serious. “Then I’ll wait for you to be ready, Eve, just like you would for me.” 

It’s obvious he’s surprised her, but his Guardian is nothing if adaptable. She exhales, sitting back down on the small couch and pulling on his hand so that he is forced to sit next to her. She turns to face him, folding the knee of her right leg between them. It’s a subtle way to ask for a bit of space, and he’s not upset. In fact, he’s relieved that she’s giving him a physical sense of her boundaries. “Okay, Librarian. Let’s talk.” 

It’s telling that he doesn’t tease her back, his expression solemn. “I’m sorry about the airport,” he begins, injecting as much honesty in his voice as possible. 

Eve’s expression stays open, but carefully constructed not to reveal her own thoughts. “Why are you sorry, Flynn?”

She’s giving him the option to elaborate; he doesn’t want to leave anything up for interpretation. “That’s not the way I wanted… that’s not how I wanted to tell you… how I felt.” The words feel wrong here, too. A love confession shouldn’t come out on the heels of an over-dramatized fight, nor should it be an addendum to an apology.

Nor should he let Eve go another second without his assurance that he doesn’t want to be without her anymore. 

She reaches out with her other hand so that his is clasped in hers, bringing his mind back to the present. “I’m not angry,” she says, suddenly gentle. “We had to put on a show, and then… well after what happened that morning, I’m not surprised what it turned into.”

“What I did - it was a one way trip, Eve. And that fight, it was a performance. It wasn’t fair of me to say any of that.”

“Flynn, I get it,” she interrupts. “Our job is important, ends and means…”

He runs an anxious hand through his hair. “That’s just it!” He argues, eyes dark and intent on her. “Listen. I met another Librarian down there. He spent his life protecting the Eye - _alone_. If I… _Eve._ I would never forgive myself if I didn’t tell you how much you mean to me.” He breathes in shakily, gathering his courage as he brings her hand to his lips, pressing a dry kiss to the inside of her wrist. “When I told you I love you,” he says, enunciating each word, trying to put weight onto each syllable, “that should mean something. That means something.” He peers up at her, still bent over her hand. 

His words send Eve into silence. Finally, she looks straight at him, and there is something terrifying and aching and vulnerable in her expression. The mask she had worn since his confession is dissolved into that of a woman that has to face his potential death everyday, and still somehow maintain her strength for the rest of her charges. “It did?” She asks, her mouth barely forming the words. 

His heart breaks at her uncertainty. That’s his fault. Eve is the strongest woman he’s ever met, the most confident, _ his Guardian, _ and he’s made her doubt what she means to him. “I don’t deserve you,” he admits, the words spilling from his mouth almost against his will, though he feels the truth in every syllable.

Her gaze hardens, always unwilling to let him shoulder all the blame. “And what about me, Flynn? You were right; I always expect you to be the hero, be the Librarian, and be here. It’s not fair of me to try to make you someone you’re not, just because it would make it easier for me.” She swallows, but her eyes do not leave his. “I’m not perfect, and sometimes I think you think I am.” 

Flynn sputters. “I - no, Eve - I would never expect…” 

“That’s just it. I’m drowning under the weight of how you see me, and in return, I’m setting impossible standards for you.”

His heart is in his throat. “Then what do we do? How do we fix this? Because I can’t- I-” She waits for him to gather his thoughts. “Eve, you’re my Guardian. Full stop. I thought - I had others, you know - but no one sees me like you do. I don’t ever want to be seen again if it’s not by you. I don't want to look at anything else now that I’ve seen you.”

_ “Flynn-” _

But he’s on a roll now. “And you’re wrong! It’s not that I don’t see your faults. You’re strict, so stubborn it makes me want to explode.” Eve gives him a look that very clearly says  _ ‘be careful,’ _ but he has a point to make even if she gets annoyed with him. “You’re obsessed with plans and even after years of seeing the worst of humanity, you have an annoying amount of faith in people, like they’re absolute truths that you can judge and you  _ can’t, _ and yes, you push me, but you push me to be better.” 

“Flynn, I-”

“I love you, Eve Baird,” he interrupts, before blushing. “Sorry, I… now you,” he adds, motioning with their joined hands in her direction. If she were anyone else, he would be embarrassed about how tightly he clings to her, but this is Eve. She would never hold that against him. 

She gives him a look, but there are tears in her eyes. “Permission to speak,” she says, sardonic but also with a strange lightness that makes him lean in closer. 

“Granted,” he murmurs, wiggling his eyebrows to make her smile. It works, and he grins back. 

She exhales. “Okay. This is only going to work if you tell me when I hurt you. If I look at you like you’re not enough, it’s not because you are. It’s because I’m in my head, because relationships are hard. Compromising and communication and staying… that’s so hard. But loving you? That’s easy, Flynn. It’s the easiest thing I’ve ever done.”

Flynn can barely breathe, moving his free hand to rest on her knee and leaning in even closer. “Can I kiss you?” He murmurs. Eve nods, and he lurches forward, pressing their lips together. It only takes a moment before he needs to hold her, releasing her hand so that he can cup her cheek, tilting her head so he can kiss her deeper. There’s the usual burning associated with having her in his arms, but there’s also this new weightlessness. It’s the same feeling he gets when he gets his hands on a new artifact, but more concentrated, more euphoric. He’s loved her for so long, since he met her, with her bright eyes and green dress and beautiful soul, that he hardly knows what to do now that she knows, now that she’s said it back. 

“I love you,” he repeats against her mouth, grinning when she has to break away because she’s laughing, loud and bright, and  _ this,  _ this is what he meant. He tells her so, and she pulls him into and over her. They sink into the settee, making out like teenagers until the world melts around them. 

And he forgets about the nuclear bomb in his pocket, if only for a night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've been sitting on the line 'when i told you i love you, that should mean something' for about a year now, so... yeah. 
> 
> i know this is marked as complete but i will continue to update as i get ideas for missing scenes!
> 
> comment ideas or if you enjoyed! <3

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to request scenes! i have a couple planned, but if i like your idea i'm happy to do more! - you can request them in the comments or on tumblr @queeenpersephone


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